![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
maculategiraffeIf all goes as planned (which nothing ever has, so why should it start now), Mr. Giraffe and I are leaving Monday for a week's vacation at the beach with my family. (It was supposed to be tomorrow, but some things already didn't go as planned.) I'm bringing my laptop, and I think they have wireless internet at the place we're renting, so I'll be checking in, but probably not that often, because, you know, beach. :D
(And family. Family's important too. Obviously.)
(Beeeeeeeeeaaaaaaaaaach.)
Okay, now here's the next Argounov-era flashback story. I know some people are going to feel I've skipped a lot here. For some of what happens in the interval (and for more Jer), check the reminiscences here and here. I'm not currently planning on writing those stories again from first-person POV; I feel it would be redundant from a story standpoint.
Also, I'm still behind on replying to comments, and on reading stories that have been posted recently, and most egregiously on updating the story index. Many apologies. I'm really trying to catch up, but I've been busy in that lots-of-little-things-to-do way that plays merry hob with my ability to actually use my brain for anything language-related without sounding like I've been run through Babelfish into Japanese and German and then back into English. (True quote at the post office yesterday: "Sending of these, and also the..." [long unhappy pause, with gestures] "....envelopes, to pay for them, I need, still. Now.") And I've been prioritizing my actual story writing in my free computer time because I don't want to pause long enough to build up another writer's block made entirely out of space between the last chapter and the current one, if you see what I mean.
So, anyway, I'll shut up. Here's the story.
"Everyone on the hall," the master yelled from the corridor, and Jer reached across before he'd even opened his eyes to grab Holden by the wrist, as Holden lunged up from the bed, and yank him back.
"Don't be a fucking idiot," he growled, but instead of growling back, Holden just nodded, as Candys and Aron scrambled past them on their way out the door of the dormitory.
"Don't worry," he said, giving Jer a faint smile. "I know."
They didn't have time for any more before tumbling out, naked and sleepy, into the hall, and joining the others at attention around the master. Argounov was fully dressed already, boots and all, but Alix, who was pressed close in the crook of his arm, was naked, her little blond head resting against the shoulder of his hunter-green tunic. Jer couldn't help sneaking a sideways glance at Holden, but Holden's face was carefully blank.
"There's been a change in your ranks," said Argounov. "I'm placing Alix above Candys."
That placed Alix above everybody. Nobody said anything. Jer didn't look over at Candys; he knew she was ready to spit nails, but he also knew nothing would show on her face.
"Holden," said the master, and Holden stepped forward, and then, to Jer's utter shock, demonstrated the very basic good sense of dropping to his knees and bowing his face to the floor, his hands pressed on either side of his head.
It startled the master about as much as it did Jer. He blinked down at Holden for a minute before he said, "Since Alix is too tenderhearted to want to see you suffer for your insolence earlier, there will be no further punishment."
"Thank you for your mercy, master," said Holden to the floor. Jer tried not to keel over from shock.
"Thank Alix for her kindness in asking me to spare you," the master directed.
"Thank you for your kindness, Alix," said Holden in the same tone.
The master took Alix by the shoulders and kissed her softly on the mouth; she kissed back, hungrily, reaching up to cling to him, and he let her do it for a moment, caressing her with a warmth Jer had never, not in four years, seen in him. Then he pulled away from her and was gone. Alix sighed, rolled her head around unselfconsciously on her shoulders and stretched, and looked around.
"Get up, Holden," she said, and Holden got up, quietly. "Sorry to wake everyone up. Go back to bed, if you like. I'm going to take a shower."
Candys and Aron shuffled, without looking back, back to the dormitory. Holden didn't move. Neither did Jer.
"All right," said Alix, smiling at both of them. "Come on, then."
They both followed her, obediently as puppies, to the dressing room, where she sat down, still naked, at one of the mirrored vanity tables, picked up a hairbrush and started brushing her hair.
"Well, that's a relief," she said to her reflection. "It's all going to be much easier, now."
Holden moved behind her and took the hairbrush from her hand, almost roughly. She smiled at his reflection in the mirror as he started brushing.
"That was great, Holden," she said. "Getting down on your knees like that, being all humble and grateful. Very impressive."
"Only so I didn't have to look at you and him being all kissy-kissy," said Holden, and Jer groaned. Alix winked at him in the mirror.
"Don't be a brat," she said to Holden. "Me being all kissy-kissy with him is why you're in here right now instead of being punished again."
"Thank you, Alix," said Holden, doubling himself over in a mockery of obeisance, "for saving my worthless hide through heavy petting with the person I hate most in the world."
"Oh, it was a little more than heavy petting," said Alix dreamily, and Holden straightened up and turned to drape himself against Jer, clobbering him accidentally in the chest with the hairbrush he still held. Jer pushed him off, but Holden came right back, clinging elaborately and batting his eyelashes before ducking his head against Jer's chest and nuzzling.
"Master," he said in a falsetto, "oh, master, please don't punish Holden. I know he's a bad, black-hearted boy, but I'm so dainty and darling that whenever anybody, even somebody nasty like Holden, gets hurt, it just makes me want to cry, cry, cry my tender little heart out!"
"Stop it," said Alix, but she was grinning, enjoying Holden, thank the gods. "It's not like that."
"I don't want to know what it's like," said Holden, pulling back from Jer and starting to brush again. "I just want to enjoy not being raped by Candys for as long as you can stay on top."
"I think I'm going to stay on top," said Alix serenely. "At least for the foreseeable future. I don't expect to get demoted."
Holden snorted. "Of course. Why should you get demoted on a whim like everybody else? Why shouldn't you be the big exception to the way things have worked around here since forever?"
"Well, I am, aren't I?" Alix stretched her arms above her head and yawned. "Has he ever let anyone else give him advice on how to handle the other slaves?"
"No," said Jer, from behind Holden, still rubbing at his chest. "And please stay the big exception. I like you being the big exception."
"I like you too, Jer," said Alix, with a beautiful smile, and Holden suddenly slammed the hairbrush down on the table and went without looking at either of them to turn on the water in one of the shower cubicles in the tiled area off the dressing room. Alix yawned again, then rose gracefully to her feet and slipped her warm little hand into Jer's.
"You're a miracle," she told Jer, leading him towards the shower room. "I don't know how you haven't killed him yourself by now."
"Neither do I," said Jer grimly, and Alix laughed.
Holden was already in one cubicle, under the water, which Jer could tell from three feet away was too hot; Holden would probably have first degree burns when he got out. Alix turned on the water in another cubicle, adjusted the temperature and tested it with a hand before stepping under.
"At my old master's," she said over the noise of the water, as Jer turned it on for his own shower, "we didn't get hot water to wash with. Master didn't like us lingering in the shower, and he liked the way our skin felt when we'd washed in cold water. And we didn't get separate cubicles to wash in, either. You two don't know how good we've got it here."
"At my old master's," Holden said, "nobody fucking backhanded me to the floor or raped me for fun."
Jer stepped under the warm rush of water with an involuntary sigh of relief. He'd only been sixteen when Argounov bought him-- younger than most of Argounov's new slaves-- but it had certainly been an improvement on his last situation, and from what the other slaves who came and went told him, it really was okay here. Maybe not the best, but not the worst either. Argounov wasn't the most cuddly, affectionate master-- well, except with Alix, but that was new- and his discipline was fairly harsh, and the sex, as Holden had demonstrated to Jer's satisfaction, could have been a lot better. But in terms of creature comforts, Argounov was generous-- and his temper wasn't unpredictable, and if Holden could have gotten over the fact that hitting and fucking were things masters had a perfect right to do to slaves, and not domestic abuse or rape like Holden seemed to think, then Holden would have been fine.
Jer was starting to think that Holden would never be fine.
He glanced up as Candys came into the room, her dark curls messy around her shoulders, and turned on the water in the fourth cubicle.
"Congratulations, Alix," she said flatly.
"Thanks, Candys," said Alix with perfect good cheer. "We were just talking about how nice it is to be allowed hot water to wash in."
"Yeah," said Candys. "I like a nice hot shower."
The water shut off in Holden's cubicle, and he stalked past Jer's, dripping on the tiled floor, on his way to the shelf where towels were kept.
"We only got cold water, at my old master's place," Alix was continuing, while Candys soaped herself up. Jer watched with lazy appreciation; Candys could be a bitch, but she was easy on the eyes. She caught him looking and didn't seem displeased.
"You want to put your eyes back in your head and get in here?" she drawled, and Jer, not at all reluctant, was already shutting off the water in his own stall when Candys added, "If it's okay with her ladyship, here."
"Whatever Jer wants is fine by me," said Alix.
"Big of you," said Candys, as Jer slipped in beside her, under the slightly-too-cool spray of water, and put one hand on her breast and the other on her hip, and then she shut up. There was some slippery rubbing and feeling-up, and eventually Jer got pushed to his knees and licked her to a nice little morning orgasm, which should put her in a decent mood at least until her first run-in with Holden. Then she got out, and Jer stayed in for a little while, considering whether to jerk himself off or press Aron into service a little later. He decided to jerk off; he didn't know what kind of mood Aron would be in, and he did know what kind of mood Holden would be in, which meant life would probably be easier if Jer wasn't planning on fucking other boys today.
"Give me a towel, would you, Holden?" Alix asked, pausing in all her wet and dripping glory right in front of Jer, which meant he had a great view as a towel hit her square in the face. Jer wanted to break Holden's nose-- maybe that would get his attention and make him stop acting like such a colossal dick-- but Alix just shook her head, unfolded the towel and started rubbing herself dry, slow and leisurely enough to give Jer a good strong finish, then wound it around her hair and passed out of Jer's field of vision as he turned into the spray to rinse off.
He turned off the water and got a towel down from the shelf. Candys, already dressed, was combing out her wet hair at one of the vanities; Holden, dressed and freshly shaved, was sitting on top of another table, looking daggers at Alix, and Alix was ignoring him, giving herself a second rub-down with a fresh towel. Jer dried off, rubbed on some lotion, took down a white tunic from the shelf where they were kept, and pulled it over his head, heading over to one of the sinks to lather up his face.
"Come here, Holden," said Alix when she'd hung up her towels to dry and slipped on a tunic, shaking out her hair. "I'll do your makeup for you."
"I don't want any goddamn makeup," said Holden sullenly, and Alix went to him and sat down on the bench of the table he was sitting on, taking his bare feet into her lap and gazing up at him over his knees.
"But you look so nice when you wear it," she coaxed. "Don't you trust my good taste? Don't answer that," she added hastily as Holden opened his mouth. "Let me rephrase. Don't you trust my aesthetic judgment?"
Holden did the fierce scowl he only did when he was trying very hard not to smile. "No."
Jer, shaved and moisturized, headed over to yet another table-- there were four, same as the showers, so people usually didn't have to wait, especially when there were only five slaves instead of six or seven-- to comb his hair and do his own makeup. He didn't wear much-- the master had made some comments to the effect that he liked Jer's lips and cheeks the way they were-- but his eyes were a good feature, and they took a little pointing up, so he lined his eyes carefully with a dark brown pencil, then brushed a purplish powder along the edge of each eyelid closest to the lashes, and finished by tinting the paler tips of his eyelashes with a touch of brown mascara.
"See," Alix was saying to Holden, massaging his calves. "Doesn't Jer look nice?"
Holden didn't answer. Jer glanced at him, then at Candys, who had taken fuller advantage of the range of powders, blushers, and lip-lacquering options available and was now fluffing up her damp hair with her fingers, trying to get it to dry faster so she could style it. Jer still wasn't sure whether she painted so much because the master liked her to, because she thought he liked her to, or just for her own pleasure. The master couldn't have disliked it, though, or he'd have told her to stop.
As Holden yielded to Alix's tugs and proddings and straddled the bench, facing her, Aron came in, peering around cautiously, as if not quite sure what he'd find them all up to.
"Good morning, sleepyhead," said Alix, rolling her fingertip in a tray of packed blue powder and applying it carefully to one of Holden's eyelids.
"Morning," said Aron, scuttling towards the shower room. He was a skinny, nervous little thing whom Jer had never liked all that much, maybe because he acted like Jer was some kind of hulking lout who might punch him unexpectedly, even though Jer was pretty sure he'd never actually hit Aron, and he was always careful when he fucked him. Jer guessed his cock was fairly large as these things went-- he was bigger than most other men he'd seen, anyway-- but it wasn't like he just rammed it in without prepping the kid first. Anyway, some people didn't seem to mind his size.
The shower turned on as Candys started piling her curls on top of her head, pinning them there with little gold-colored hairpins. Alix was lining Holden's eyes with a dark pencil.
"Now, don't go rubbing your eyes and smudging this," she directed.
"I don't know why you've got to paint me up like a whore," said Holden, and out of the corner of Jer's eye, Candys stiffened. Jer rolled his eyes a little; he'd never understand how a sex slave could scrape together enough fake dignity to take offense at the term whore-- or say it as if it didn't apply to him, for that matter. "It's not like I want him to see me and think 'oooh, now that's the one I feel like raping right now.'"
"Maybe not," said Alix calmly, "but you might want him to see you and think "ah, how sweet, Holden's making an effort. Maybe I shouldn't sell him."
Holden made a sudden startled movement, not much, but enough that the pencil would have stabbed him in the eye if Alix hadn't pulled it back quick enough.
"What's that supposed to mean?" he demanded. "Did he say-- is he planning on selling me?"
"Not if I can help it," said Alix, "but it wouldn't hurt if you behaved yourself every so often, either." She resumed her eyelining as Holden sat staring at her. "Hold still."
"I am still," said Holden.
"Hold your eyelid still." Alix finished and set the pencil down. "There. May I do a little lip liner, too? Just a little. You have such a lovely mouth."
"Alix--"
Candys, with unaccustomed tact-- or maybe just accidental good timing-- got up and left the room.
"Oh, Holden," said Alix, cupping his face in her hands and kissing his forehead. "I didn't mean to scare you. But you must know you're on thin ice with him, the way you act."
"I just--" Holden looked down.
"I know," said Alix, running her hands through his damp hair. "It's all right, Holden. You did so well this morning. One gesture like that goes a long way, you know. If you can just manage something like that every now and then-- I'm sure I can do the rest."
"I hate that I don't want him to sell me," said Holden dully, without looking up. "I hate that I even care. You know? It was easier when I was just-- hoping he'd kill me or something."
"I know it's easier in some ways if you don't care, Holden," said Alix softly, "but you can't live that way, can you? And we-- Jer and I--"
Holden swung his leg over the bench so abruptly he almost kicked her, and lunged to his feet, and then just stood there, as if he'd forgotten what he was going to do when he got up. Jer and Alix sat watching him for a little while, until he finally, slowly, sat back down. Alix put a hand on his back, and he shivered, and then he was still.
"Yeah," he said, without looking at Alix. "Okay. You can do the lip liner."
"Turn towards me, then," said Alix gently, and Holden obeyed.
(And family. Family's important too. Obviously.)
(Beeeeeeeeeaaaaaaaaaach.)
Okay, now here's the next Argounov-era flashback story. I know some people are going to feel I've skipped a lot here. For some of what happens in the interval (and for more Jer), check the reminiscences here and here. I'm not currently planning on writing those stories again from first-person POV; I feel it would be redundant from a story standpoint.
Also, I'm still behind on replying to comments, and on reading stories that have been posted recently, and most egregiously on updating the story index. Many apologies. I'm really trying to catch up, but I've been busy in that lots-of-little-things-to-do way that plays merry hob with my ability to actually use my brain for anything language-related without sounding like I've been run through Babelfish into Japanese and German and then back into English. (True quote at the post office yesterday: "Sending of these, and also the..." [long unhappy pause, with gestures] "....envelopes, to pay for them, I need, still. Now.") And I've been prioritizing my actual story writing in my free computer time because I don't want to pause long enough to build up another writer's block made entirely out of space between the last chapter and the current one, if you see what I mean.
So, anyway, I'll shut up. Here's the story.
"Everyone on the hall," the master yelled from the corridor, and Jer reached across before he'd even opened his eyes to grab Holden by the wrist, as Holden lunged up from the bed, and yank him back.
"Don't be a fucking idiot," he growled, but instead of growling back, Holden just nodded, as Candys and Aron scrambled past them on their way out the door of the dormitory.
"Don't worry," he said, giving Jer a faint smile. "I know."
They didn't have time for any more before tumbling out, naked and sleepy, into the hall, and joining the others at attention around the master. Argounov was fully dressed already, boots and all, but Alix, who was pressed close in the crook of his arm, was naked, her little blond head resting against the shoulder of his hunter-green tunic. Jer couldn't help sneaking a sideways glance at Holden, but Holden's face was carefully blank.
"There's been a change in your ranks," said Argounov. "I'm placing Alix above Candys."
That placed Alix above everybody. Nobody said anything. Jer didn't look over at Candys; he knew she was ready to spit nails, but he also knew nothing would show on her face.
"Holden," said the master, and Holden stepped forward, and then, to Jer's utter shock, demonstrated the very basic good sense of dropping to his knees and bowing his face to the floor, his hands pressed on either side of his head.
It startled the master about as much as it did Jer. He blinked down at Holden for a minute before he said, "Since Alix is too tenderhearted to want to see you suffer for your insolence earlier, there will be no further punishment."
"Thank you for your mercy, master," said Holden to the floor. Jer tried not to keel over from shock.
"Thank Alix for her kindness in asking me to spare you," the master directed.
"Thank you for your kindness, Alix," said Holden in the same tone.
The master took Alix by the shoulders and kissed her softly on the mouth; she kissed back, hungrily, reaching up to cling to him, and he let her do it for a moment, caressing her with a warmth Jer had never, not in four years, seen in him. Then he pulled away from her and was gone. Alix sighed, rolled her head around unselfconsciously on her shoulders and stretched, and looked around.
"Get up, Holden," she said, and Holden got up, quietly. "Sorry to wake everyone up. Go back to bed, if you like. I'm going to take a shower."
Candys and Aron shuffled, without looking back, back to the dormitory. Holden didn't move. Neither did Jer.
"All right," said Alix, smiling at both of them. "Come on, then."
They both followed her, obediently as puppies, to the dressing room, where she sat down, still naked, at one of the mirrored vanity tables, picked up a hairbrush and started brushing her hair.
"Well, that's a relief," she said to her reflection. "It's all going to be much easier, now."
Holden moved behind her and took the hairbrush from her hand, almost roughly. She smiled at his reflection in the mirror as he started brushing.
"That was great, Holden," she said. "Getting down on your knees like that, being all humble and grateful. Very impressive."
"Only so I didn't have to look at you and him being all kissy-kissy," said Holden, and Jer groaned. Alix winked at him in the mirror.
"Don't be a brat," she said to Holden. "Me being all kissy-kissy with him is why you're in here right now instead of being punished again."
"Thank you, Alix," said Holden, doubling himself over in a mockery of obeisance, "for saving my worthless hide through heavy petting with the person I hate most in the world."
"Oh, it was a little more than heavy petting," said Alix dreamily, and Holden straightened up and turned to drape himself against Jer, clobbering him accidentally in the chest with the hairbrush he still held. Jer pushed him off, but Holden came right back, clinging elaborately and batting his eyelashes before ducking his head against Jer's chest and nuzzling.
"Master," he said in a falsetto, "oh, master, please don't punish Holden. I know he's a bad, black-hearted boy, but I'm so dainty and darling that whenever anybody, even somebody nasty like Holden, gets hurt, it just makes me want to cry, cry, cry my tender little heart out!"
"Stop it," said Alix, but she was grinning, enjoying Holden, thank the gods. "It's not like that."
"I don't want to know what it's like," said Holden, pulling back from Jer and starting to brush again. "I just want to enjoy not being raped by Candys for as long as you can stay on top."
"I think I'm going to stay on top," said Alix serenely. "At least for the foreseeable future. I don't expect to get demoted."
Holden snorted. "Of course. Why should you get demoted on a whim like everybody else? Why shouldn't you be the big exception to the way things have worked around here since forever?"
"Well, I am, aren't I?" Alix stretched her arms above her head and yawned. "Has he ever let anyone else give him advice on how to handle the other slaves?"
"No," said Jer, from behind Holden, still rubbing at his chest. "And please stay the big exception. I like you being the big exception."
"I like you too, Jer," said Alix, with a beautiful smile, and Holden suddenly slammed the hairbrush down on the table and went without looking at either of them to turn on the water in one of the shower cubicles in the tiled area off the dressing room. Alix yawned again, then rose gracefully to her feet and slipped her warm little hand into Jer's.
"You're a miracle," she told Jer, leading him towards the shower room. "I don't know how you haven't killed him yourself by now."
"Neither do I," said Jer grimly, and Alix laughed.
Holden was already in one cubicle, under the water, which Jer could tell from three feet away was too hot; Holden would probably have first degree burns when he got out. Alix turned on the water in another cubicle, adjusted the temperature and tested it with a hand before stepping under.
"At my old master's," she said over the noise of the water, as Jer turned it on for his own shower, "we didn't get hot water to wash with. Master didn't like us lingering in the shower, and he liked the way our skin felt when we'd washed in cold water. And we didn't get separate cubicles to wash in, either. You two don't know how good we've got it here."
"At my old master's," Holden said, "nobody fucking backhanded me to the floor or raped me for fun."
Jer stepped under the warm rush of water with an involuntary sigh of relief. He'd only been sixteen when Argounov bought him-- younger than most of Argounov's new slaves-- but it had certainly been an improvement on his last situation, and from what the other slaves who came and went told him, it really was okay here. Maybe not the best, but not the worst either. Argounov wasn't the most cuddly, affectionate master-- well, except with Alix, but that was new- and his discipline was fairly harsh, and the sex, as Holden had demonstrated to Jer's satisfaction, could have been a lot better. But in terms of creature comforts, Argounov was generous-- and his temper wasn't unpredictable, and if Holden could have gotten over the fact that hitting and fucking were things masters had a perfect right to do to slaves, and not domestic abuse or rape like Holden seemed to think, then Holden would have been fine.
Jer was starting to think that Holden would never be fine.
He glanced up as Candys came into the room, her dark curls messy around her shoulders, and turned on the water in the fourth cubicle.
"Congratulations, Alix," she said flatly.
"Thanks, Candys," said Alix with perfect good cheer. "We were just talking about how nice it is to be allowed hot water to wash in."
"Yeah," said Candys. "I like a nice hot shower."
The water shut off in Holden's cubicle, and he stalked past Jer's, dripping on the tiled floor, on his way to the shelf where towels were kept.
"We only got cold water, at my old master's place," Alix was continuing, while Candys soaped herself up. Jer watched with lazy appreciation; Candys could be a bitch, but she was easy on the eyes. She caught him looking and didn't seem displeased.
"You want to put your eyes back in your head and get in here?" she drawled, and Jer, not at all reluctant, was already shutting off the water in his own stall when Candys added, "If it's okay with her ladyship, here."
"Whatever Jer wants is fine by me," said Alix.
"Big of you," said Candys, as Jer slipped in beside her, under the slightly-too-cool spray of water, and put one hand on her breast and the other on her hip, and then she shut up. There was some slippery rubbing and feeling-up, and eventually Jer got pushed to his knees and licked her to a nice little morning orgasm, which should put her in a decent mood at least until her first run-in with Holden. Then she got out, and Jer stayed in for a little while, considering whether to jerk himself off or press Aron into service a little later. He decided to jerk off; he didn't know what kind of mood Aron would be in, and he did know what kind of mood Holden would be in, which meant life would probably be easier if Jer wasn't planning on fucking other boys today.
"Give me a towel, would you, Holden?" Alix asked, pausing in all her wet and dripping glory right in front of Jer, which meant he had a great view as a towel hit her square in the face. Jer wanted to break Holden's nose-- maybe that would get his attention and make him stop acting like such a colossal dick-- but Alix just shook her head, unfolded the towel and started rubbing herself dry, slow and leisurely enough to give Jer a good strong finish, then wound it around her hair and passed out of Jer's field of vision as he turned into the spray to rinse off.
He turned off the water and got a towel down from the shelf. Candys, already dressed, was combing out her wet hair at one of the vanities; Holden, dressed and freshly shaved, was sitting on top of another table, looking daggers at Alix, and Alix was ignoring him, giving herself a second rub-down with a fresh towel. Jer dried off, rubbed on some lotion, took down a white tunic from the shelf where they were kept, and pulled it over his head, heading over to one of the sinks to lather up his face.
"Come here, Holden," said Alix when she'd hung up her towels to dry and slipped on a tunic, shaking out her hair. "I'll do your makeup for you."
"I don't want any goddamn makeup," said Holden sullenly, and Alix went to him and sat down on the bench of the table he was sitting on, taking his bare feet into her lap and gazing up at him over his knees.
"But you look so nice when you wear it," she coaxed. "Don't you trust my good taste? Don't answer that," she added hastily as Holden opened his mouth. "Let me rephrase. Don't you trust my aesthetic judgment?"
Holden did the fierce scowl he only did when he was trying very hard not to smile. "No."
Jer, shaved and moisturized, headed over to yet another table-- there were four, same as the showers, so people usually didn't have to wait, especially when there were only five slaves instead of six or seven-- to comb his hair and do his own makeup. He didn't wear much-- the master had made some comments to the effect that he liked Jer's lips and cheeks the way they were-- but his eyes were a good feature, and they took a little pointing up, so he lined his eyes carefully with a dark brown pencil, then brushed a purplish powder along the edge of each eyelid closest to the lashes, and finished by tinting the paler tips of his eyelashes with a touch of brown mascara.
"See," Alix was saying to Holden, massaging his calves. "Doesn't Jer look nice?"
Holden didn't answer. Jer glanced at him, then at Candys, who had taken fuller advantage of the range of powders, blushers, and lip-lacquering options available and was now fluffing up her damp hair with her fingers, trying to get it to dry faster so she could style it. Jer still wasn't sure whether she painted so much because the master liked her to, because she thought he liked her to, or just for her own pleasure. The master couldn't have disliked it, though, or he'd have told her to stop.
As Holden yielded to Alix's tugs and proddings and straddled the bench, facing her, Aron came in, peering around cautiously, as if not quite sure what he'd find them all up to.
"Good morning, sleepyhead," said Alix, rolling her fingertip in a tray of packed blue powder and applying it carefully to one of Holden's eyelids.
"Morning," said Aron, scuttling towards the shower room. He was a skinny, nervous little thing whom Jer had never liked all that much, maybe because he acted like Jer was some kind of hulking lout who might punch him unexpectedly, even though Jer was pretty sure he'd never actually hit Aron, and he was always careful when he fucked him. Jer guessed his cock was fairly large as these things went-- he was bigger than most other men he'd seen, anyway-- but it wasn't like he just rammed it in without prepping the kid first. Anyway, some people didn't seem to mind his size.
The shower turned on as Candys started piling her curls on top of her head, pinning them there with little gold-colored hairpins. Alix was lining Holden's eyes with a dark pencil.
"Now, don't go rubbing your eyes and smudging this," she directed.
"I don't know why you've got to paint me up like a whore," said Holden, and out of the corner of Jer's eye, Candys stiffened. Jer rolled his eyes a little; he'd never understand how a sex slave could scrape together enough fake dignity to take offense at the term whore-- or say it as if it didn't apply to him, for that matter. "It's not like I want him to see me and think 'oooh, now that's the one I feel like raping right now.'"
"Maybe not," said Alix calmly, "but you might want him to see you and think "ah, how sweet, Holden's making an effort. Maybe I shouldn't sell him."
Holden made a sudden startled movement, not much, but enough that the pencil would have stabbed him in the eye if Alix hadn't pulled it back quick enough.
"What's that supposed to mean?" he demanded. "Did he say-- is he planning on selling me?"
"Not if I can help it," said Alix, "but it wouldn't hurt if you behaved yourself every so often, either." She resumed her eyelining as Holden sat staring at her. "Hold still."
"I am still," said Holden.
"Hold your eyelid still." Alix finished and set the pencil down. "There. May I do a little lip liner, too? Just a little. You have such a lovely mouth."
"Alix--"
Candys, with unaccustomed tact-- or maybe just accidental good timing-- got up and left the room.
"Oh, Holden," said Alix, cupping his face in her hands and kissing his forehead. "I didn't mean to scare you. But you must know you're on thin ice with him, the way you act."
"I just--" Holden looked down.
"I know," said Alix, running her hands through his damp hair. "It's all right, Holden. You did so well this morning. One gesture like that goes a long way, you know. If you can just manage something like that every now and then-- I'm sure I can do the rest."
"I hate that I don't want him to sell me," said Holden dully, without looking up. "I hate that I even care. You know? It was easier when I was just-- hoping he'd kill me or something."
"I know it's easier in some ways if you don't care, Holden," said Alix softly, "but you can't live that way, can you? And we-- Jer and I--"
Holden swung his leg over the bench so abruptly he almost kicked her, and lunged to his feet, and then just stood there, as if he'd forgotten what he was going to do when he got up. Jer and Alix sat watching him for a little while, until he finally, slowly, sat back down. Alix put a hand on his back, and he shivered, and then he was still.
"Yeah," he said, without looking at Alix. "Okay. You can do the lip liner."
"Turn towards me, then," said Alix gently, and Holden obeyed.
